TEN things you wish you could say to TEN different people right now:

10. Please don't break my heart or let me break yours.

9. Be honest with me about everything, especially with your opinions.

8. I never wanted to hurt you, I just wanted you to be happy and if I had stayed we both would have been miserable.

7. I'm sorry I am not that great of a friend. I try my best and I just want you to be happy.

6. I respect you for who you are in my life, but quite frankly I hardly know who you are and you sure as heck don't know me...its too little too late to want to be buddy-buddy. And stop holding everything you have done for me and my siblings over my head as if that is going to make me want to build a relationship with you.

5. I love you, even though I don't say it often enough.

4. He is great for you and even though you don't think so, you deserve to be happy with him just as much as he is happy with you.

3. Come live with me! I might go insane without my daily dosage of Korean!

2. I am sorry I make mistakes, just don't give up on me because I am not ready to give up yet.

1. I love my life.

NINE things about yourself:

9. I love my life.

8. I don't always have the best opinion about my appearance but I know that Ryan will never complain about how nasty I look.

7. I love crayons and coloring books.

6. I can't wait to start decorating my own house!!!!!!!!!!

5. I try not to be caught up in my emotions although it is tough when you are a woman.

4. I love to dance, especially with my mom and sisters.

3. I get too deep into characters in books/movies/tv shows, I end up feeling the same feelings and, yeah lets just say Ryan gets the bad end of my ability to imagine.

2. My family is AWESOME! I wouldn't trade them for the world.

1. I like being myself; therefore, I am attractive.

EIGHT ways to win your heart:

8. Make me laugh and smile.

7. Tell me I am beautiful and mean it.

6. Treat me like a lady, or even a queen...although never always like a queen.

5. Tell me the truth even if it hurts to hear it.

4. Love me just as much or even more than I love you.

3. Hold me when I want to be held.

2. Leave me alone when I need to be alone.

1. Make me scream from wanting you so bad.

SEVEN things that cross your mind a lot:

7. I hope this is ok.

6. Well, there goes that.

5. I am so pathetic.

4. I am too lazy, I should exercise more now that I sit down nine hours a day rather than being on my feet.

3. I wonder what Ryan is thinking right now? He is looking at me funny.

2. I wish this freaking dog would listen to me once in a while.

1. How am I going to afford the summer electric bills with both Ryan (a hot temperatured man of 6'4") and a siberian husky who wants nothing more than to be in -10 degree weather.

SIX things you do before you fall asleep :

6. Turn off my computer.

5. Call Ryan to say goodnight.

4. Read either the newest book I am into or read my modules.

3. Brush my teeth.

2. Set my alarm.

1. Turn off my lamp and strip down to nothing, snuggle under the covers.

FIVE people who mean a lot at the moment: (not in any order)

5. Ryan

4. Biz

3. Mom/Joe

2. Sarah/Buddy

1. God

FOUR things you see right now:

4. Box of crayons

3. Lotion

2. Flower pen from work

1. A Tiger

THREE songs that you listen to often at the moment:

3. Let It Whip--Dazz Band

2. T.I. feat. Justin Timberlake--Dead and Gone

1. Ciara feat. Justin Timberlake--Love Sex Magic

TWO things you want to do before you die:

2. Become a well known Interior Designer who only has to work for fun rather than out of necessity.

1. Have a relatively large family and live a happy life.

ONE confession:

I am scared like hell with all of the decisions I make everyday, especially nowadays. I just hope everything works out well with the decisions I have made.